Years ago I used to set resolutions at this time of year.  They were always big ones and the sort that by mid-January; I’d either forgotten about, decided were totally unachievable or didn’t believe I could achieve. You know the type of thing; going running every day, loose 2 stone without dieting, never get stressed again etc etc. When I became a parent, I added in things like never shout, lose my cool or be an amazing parent at all times. Definitely not achievable!  

Intentions

For the last few years I haven’t set resolutions, instead I’ve made an intention.   They don’t involve huge goals, or tonnes of willpower, just an intention to do something.  This year it’s committing to being consistent.  Consistent with my self-care predominantly, as that impacts on all aspects of my life.  When I’m looking after myself well (physically, emotionally and mentally) I’m better able to do all the other things I want to do,  I’m less likely to eat chocolate when I feel emotional, I’m less likely to shout at my son and not be the parent I want to be, I’m better able to support parents and have the energy to do more. I have the energy to have a social life (not that my son is a fan of me doing that, apparently I’m too old!) and loads of other things.  So that’s my intention this year.  To consistently look after me.  Importantly, it’s not a stick to beat myself with though so if I don’t achieve it one day, it’s OK I can pick up and start again the next day. 

Vision Board

The other thing I love to do at this time of year is a vision board.  I started doing these with my son a few years ago and it’s great.  We sit down together and think about the things we’d like to do that year.  It can be anything from a holiday, to a place we’d like to go for dinner and something we’d like to try.  My son has quite expensive tastes so I do have to manage things a little bit. We won’t be going to Hawaii, Florida and India this year!  Sometimes we put things on the board that we know won’t happen this year but we can plan to do them in future years. 

Then comes the fun part.  We found pictures of the various activities and trips we wanted to do. These came from the internet, magazines and brochures then we started cutting them out.  We had a big piece of cardboard and my son drew the ‘2020’ right in the middle.  Once that was done we stuck the pictures around it.  Now it’s up in the kitchen for everyone to see and a reminder to us of what we are going to do this year. 

I do it old school with paper and glue, but I know people who use Pinterest or create them digitally using other software.  How you do it doesn’t matter.  I love the fact that together we have decided that as a family we want to do this year. 

What you put on there will be personal you to and your family, there are no right or wrongs.  You might want to focus on small things or a mixture of things, it doesn’t matter. 

Raising Your Presence

Spending time doing activities like this is also a great way to raise your presence as a parent and show them you are interested in their ideas.   

When we first did this a few years ago it helped my son see a future in our family, which I think was helpful and also to have some input into what we did.  It was lovely being able to stick big ticks on things on the board as we went through the year and he would remind me of our plans. 

I thought I’d share this, in case it’s new to you.  It’s a fun, interesting activity to do and I always love hearing what my son thinks he’d like to do this year. 

Support

For more topics of discussion, the Connective Parenting Hub might be useful for you. Connective Parenting Hub members have access to recorded teaches/discussions, as well as newly added written resources and loads more- https://sarahpfisher.com/connectiveparentinghub/ 

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