I’ve always been a glass half full kind of girl, seeing the best in situations and believing everything will work out for the best. On the whole that’s true. I find a way of working through things, even when I can’t see a clear path or have no idea what to do.
When I became a parent, I kept this mindset. Always believing I could get through whatever was going on, even in the darkest of times something inside me kept me going. Something helped me believe we could get through and things would get better. Thankfully that’s what happened.
Having a positive mindset is great but it doesn’t mean that sometimes I don’t feel down. The important thing for me is to acknowledge the feeling, accept that’s how I feel and then letting it go. I do this in a variety of different ways. Sometimes I journal about how I feel, sometimes I use EFT or tapping and sometimes I just talk to a friend. I find journaling is particularly effective, so long as I’m honest with myself as I’m writing. I just write whatever comes into my head and often I find it helps to bring clarity to my thoughts and shift any difficult feelings.
When we don’t deal with our feelings, by ignoring them or just hoping they will go away, over time they will often get worse and deepen. Ignoring our own feelings is not good for us or those around us and it can have a negative impact on our relationships with our family and friends.
I know that when I’m not dealing with my emotions it impacts on how I parent my son. My patience is much lower, I’m more snappy and more likely to shout. This is often a red flag to me that I’ve not been doing enough to look after me.
Whatever we tell our mind is what it gives us. If we tell our mind our feelings aren’t important and that we don’t need to deal with them, we won’t. We will start to see more and more of the negative thoughts and move into a downward spiral. So, whilst I’m all for positive thinking, having gratitude and writing down 3 positives every day, it’s always critical that we deal with the negative feelings at the same time, so they don’t suddenly come back to bite us on the bum!
I’ve made a commitment to myself to make sure I acknowledge all my feelings, positive and negative, so I can have a healthy balanced mindset.
We are talking a lot about this in the Connective Parenting Hub, amongst lots of other things. If you’d like support and help, then come and join us. It’s only £15 a month for all the help and support you need. Click HERE for more details.
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